My Life as the Only Northerner Amongst Southerners

Because I'm a Christian and Fulanis are Muslims, and because my family never lived amongst other Northerners in the UK, I have grown up surrounded by Yorubas and Igbos. So at the Nigerian event I go to I am the only Northerner present. I am sometimes the first Fulani person many people have ever met.

Being amongst your countrymen yet feeling out of place for being the only one of your ethnicity is an interesting predicament.

Feeling Like an Outsider
No one ever assumes I'm Nigerian, so I'm always self-conscious at a Nigerian gathering. People say I look Jamaican, West Indian, Sierra Leonean, Ethiopian, Cameroonian, Somalian...I've heard it all, except Nigerian. When people question your origin all the time and are surprised when you tell them where you're from, you start to view yourself differently.

Sometimes I feel like declaring my origin the minute I step into a Nigerian event to avoid confusion, or tattoo 'Yes, I am Nigerian too' on my forehead. I often feel like an impostor at these gatherings, and I imagine that some people are thinking "What's that Jamaican girl doing here?"

In a couple of churches I've been to (and I've been to a lot both as a worshipper and a Christian media journalist) the Pastor would tell a Yoruba joke or proverb at the pulpit that everyone laughs or nods at except me; or the choir would sing a popular Yoruba song everyone else would sing along to except me. I've even been to a Nigerian comedy show where comedians told their jokes in pidgin and Yoruba.


The 'Are You Nigerian?' Question
I've been asked the question 'Are you Nigerian?' at least once a week since forever, and at least three Nigerian acquaintances I've known were unaware that I was one of them for many years. They assumed that I was West Indian.

The funny thing is that when people want to decipher my origins by asking my name, hearing my English name doesn't help. They then ask for my surname (because most Nigerians despite an English first name usually have a 'native' surname) and my equally English surname doesn't help either.

Some people who asked me these questions leave it there and I thus retain my ethnic ambiguity in their eyes. The majority just ask outright "Are you Nigerian?"

People Treat Me Differently

In certain situations, people would speak Yoruba or pidgin to everyone else in the group I'm with, then turn to me to translate what they've just said or joke that I probably don't understand (I understand Pidgin and a bit of Yoruba).

Or people are more gentle or nicer to me than they would be to a fellow Nigerian. For instance when I go up to be served food at the buffet table at a wedding reception, some of the ladies serving would describe the details of the yam porridge (asaro) or beans (ewa agoyin) they're serving me, assuming I'm new to these foods (I'm not). Or a Nigerian Auntie we don't know would chastise my Nigerian friend for doing something, but won't chastise me for doing the same thing because she doesn't feel familiar enough with me.

When people don't think I'm 'one of them' they are nicer in a detached, polite way, but this just strengthens the invisible barrier between us. And some only become 'real' with me when they find out I'm Nigerian too.

Changing Accents

A few people will be verbally-jousting in pidgin, but when I join in the conversation they respond in a British accent. Or someone would talk to my friend in a relaxed Nigerian-accent, but talk to me in a forced British accent.

Or my conversation with someone would begin with them 'forming' the Queen's English to me, but after I tell them I'm Nigerian too thinking that this should get them to relax, they continue to form because they're not quite at home with me being Nigerian.

The Fulani Ambassador 

People often ask me to "say something in Hausa" or they say the Hausa words they know and ask for a translation or a response from me. Some ask me if various stereotypes they've heard about Fulanis are true, and when any Hausa-related issue occurs, they want my thoughts on it.

A couple of Southern Aunties who grew up in the North were delighted when they found out I spoke Hausa, and were happy to speak it again with me. It's always lovely when this happens, and the aunties then make sure to always speak to me in Hausa whenever we meet.

Much to my chagrin though, a few people who have a bit of exposure to Fulanis want to show they know a lot about my people and challenge me on some aspect of my culture. For example:

Them: Isn't the Fulani traditional dress a type of lacey material?

Me: No it's a white, cottony top and wrapper combo with pastel colours at the front.

Them: Are you sure? I swear it's a kind of lacey, covered top that kinda flares at the sleeves...

Me: Nope

Them: I don't think so. Are you really sure?

'Nigerian' means Yoruba

I go to events marked as Nigerian - like the Nigerian carnival in London or a Nollywood film premiere, but usually these events are attended by 85% Yoruba, 10% Igbo and 5% other Southerners. There's even a Yoruba festival in the UK. But I've never heard of an event that celebrates Fulani or Northern culture or ever been to a large Hausa or Fulani gathering that involved more than two families. In my UK experience, being Nigerian means being the only Northerner in a room full of Yorubas.

I enjoy being with my people. There's an easiness and familiarity I appreciate when I'm at such events, and a jovial humour and sense of fun and craziness you wouldn't get anywhere. There's also no wedding like a Nigerian wedding (see my Nigerian Wedding vs British Weddings post)

Yet sometimes I feel acutely aware of my difference: I often don't act, know, understand or feel like everyone else in these places, and for all our kinship I might as well be a white person due to their perception of me and my perception of myself.

Seeing Two Sides
For those that carry clues to their origins in their name, appearance or personality, people have already made up their mind about you before they meet you or the minute they meet you. But my apparent ambiguity means I'm able to note how people respond to me before and after they find out where I'm from.

The majority of White People are indifferent when they find out I'm Nigerian. In fact, many don't even ask unless they have a legitimate reason to. Some express mild surprise because they say I didn't act the way they expected Nigerians to act, and a few have 'the look' of negative pre-judgement quickly pass over their eyes but even then, they successfully continue to act normal.

Nigerians are generally guarded or civil with me to begin with, then when they find out, become friendlier and more comfortable around me. They are also very surprised and ask lost of questions; I've had to recount which State in Nigeria my parents come from, the number of years I've lived in the UK and whether I speak Hausa so many times! 

Northerners embrace me and tell me they suspected it when they find out, but on the whole they have no idea I'm Fulani too due to my non-Muslimness.

Other Africans are surprised because they expected me to be a certain way. Some Jamaicans are so sure I'm one of them that they speak Patois to me and feel very comfortable around me, and when they find out I'm Nigerian they are disappointed. 

Life as 'the only Fulani in the village' is interesting to say the least!

Is a Hausa Film Industry (Kannywood) Necessary?

About 20 years ago, Hausa producers developed a film industry called Kannywood (named after Kano state where many of the movies are filmed) catering to a Hausa-speaking audience, despite the fact that Nigeria already has an established and popular film industry called Nollywood.

 

 Kannywood stars from top to bottom: Maryam Booth, Ali Nuhu, Jamila Umar, Ibrahim Maishunku

Many wonder why Kannywood is necessary. Doesn't Nollywood represent us all? Well, yes and no.

Firstly, the majority of Nollywood's film-makers and film-stars are from Southern Nigeria, so much of its storylines and themes are centred around the unique experiences of Igbos and Yorubas. But there is no common Nigerian culture, only dominant ones.

Secondly Nollywood is mostly Christian and westernised, whilst Northern Nigerians are mostly Muslim and Middle-Easternised. This means that Hausas often cannot identify with much of the motivations, interactions and morality in the films.

Kannywood movies are also more conservative in style, (modest dressing, almost no male and female touching) concentrate on Hausa-Islamic culture (e.g. polygamous marriages, the Qu'ran) and music and dance interludes are used as a storytelling device similar to Bollywood films. However, both industries share similarities in that marriage and familial relationships dominate plot lines and popular conventions like village life, religion, absence of child characters and respect for elders are integral.

Kannywood film with English subtitles: Uwar Miji
Starring Ali Nuhu, Hajara Usman and Zainab Yunusa Odariko
A domineering mother does everything she can to get rid of her son's virtuous wife

Kannywood is an expression of a Hausa-Fulani sub-culture within the Nigerian national culture, in the same way that the African-American TV channel BET exists alongside mainstream channels and the Black British MOBO awards exists despite the Brit Awards.

Criticisms of Kannywood for being tribalist are disingenuous because we are all aware of our cultural differences. 

Nigeria was a region populated by hundreds of tribal groups and leadership systems, where distinct kingdoms like the Benin, Oyo, Nupe and Sokoto empires lived independently from, and sometimes were at war with each other.

Abubakar Tafawa Balewa, Nigeria's first Prime Minister said in 1948:

"Since 1914 the British Government has been trying to make Nigeria into one country, but the Nigerian people themselves are historically different in their backgrounds, in their religious beliefs and customs...Nigerian unity is only a British invention."

Eminent Politician Obafemi Awolowo said in 1947:

"Nigeria is not a nation. It is a mere geographical expression. There are no 'Nigerians' in the same sense as there are 'English', 'Welsh' or 'French'. The word 'Nigerian' is merely a distinctive appellation to distinguish those who live within the boundaries of Nigeria and those who do not."

If Africa hadn't been colonised by Europeans, there probably would be over 2,000 countries in the continent due to the diversity of its peoples and their desire for autonomy; and the area called Nigeria would be made up of at least eight countries. In contrast to Western Europe which has 18 countries speaking around 18 languages, Nigeria alone houses 250 languages. 

Kannywood film with English subtitles: Alawiyya
Starring Aminu Shariff and Maryam Booth
A girl is raped and becomes pregnant and a kind stranger pretends he's her husband to avoid her parents anger

Although Nollywood and Kannywood both cater to Nigerians, Nollywood has a higher profile, generates more revenue and is increasingly collaborating with Hollywood and been viewed by an international audience.

But the two industries were never in competition with each other and I think Kannywood is content with simply entertaining its Northern audiences in ways they can appreciate.

*Quotes taken from 'The State of Africa: A History of Fifty Years of Independence' by Martin Meredith

Helpful Hausa Words and Translations

Most Nigerians are familiar with some Hausa words. But have you ever wanted to talk to Hausa people or toast a pretty Hausa girl but didn't know how? Well have no fear, your friendly Hausa-speaking Nigerian is here to help.

Below is a list of words and phrases you can use to communicate with (stereo) typical Hausa people. Note the extensive use of a as described in Why I Love the Hausa Language. The pronounciations can be tricky though and a word can have two meanings depending on the stress of a syllable, so good luck!

Talking to a Hausa/Fulani girl
Kin yi kyau walahi! .... You are very pretty!
Me sunan ki? ............. What is your name?
Ina son ki ............. I love you
Baban ki barawo ne, dan ya sata               Your father is a thief cos he stole the stars
wuta daga sama ya sa a idon ki! .............  from the sky and put them in your eyes!
Za ki aure ni? .............. Will you marry me?
Kina son ki je Dubai da ni? ...........  Do you want to come to Dubai with me?
Baban ki yana gida? .................   Is your father at home?               

Fulani girl in traditional Fulani costume

Talking to a Hausa Gateman
You
Menene? .............What is it?
Ka gama? ............. Have you finished?  
Ka tafi ............. You can go (male, replace ka with ki if female)
Ka dawo gobe .............. Come back tomorrow
Ina zuwa ............ I'm coming
Bude gate.............. Open the gate
Kule gate............... Lock the gate


Him
Bani kudi na ............ Give me my money
Na gama ............I've finished
Zan tafi ............ I'm going
Ban gan moton ka ba............ I didn't see your car
              
Talking to Almajiris
Ka na iya karatu? .............. Can you read?
Ka na jin yunwa? ...............  Are you hungry?
Ina maman da baban ka? .......... Where is your mum and dad?
Ina gidan ka? ................ Where is your house?
Tafi chan! ................ Go away!
Ka barni! ................. Leave me alone!
Ba ni da kudi ............. I don't have any money
Ka je makaranta ................. Go to school
Boko ba haram ba! .............. Western education is not a sin!

Other helpful words:

Greetings
Yayade ............ Hello/How are you
Answer: Lafiya ............ I'm fine

Ina Kwana ........... Good morning
Answer: Lafiya ......... Fine

Sai wata rana .......... See you later
Sai gobe .......... See you tomorrow

Speaking
Bin sani ba .......... I don't know
Ba Hausa ...........  I don't speak Hausa
Ba Turanchi ........ I don't speak English

At the Shop/Store

Nawa ne? .................... How much is it?

Ina son in siya ..............  I want to buy

Kudi ................ Money

Wanchan ................. That one

Ya yi tsada ................ It's expensive

Nagode .................. Thank You

Bani... .................. Give me....

Ai (as in hay) ..................  Yes

A-a (as in rapper) ...........  No (Listen to this)

Ba kudi ............... I don't have money     

Numbers

Daya (One)                                     

Biyu (Two)

Uku (Three)

Hudu (Four)

Biyar (Five)

Shida (Six)

Bakwai (Seven)

Takwas (Eight)

Tara (Nine)

Goma (Ten)

Goma-sha-daya (Eleven: ten and one; and so on)

General  Words and Phrases

Gobe ............ Tomorrow

Yau (as in Go) ............ Today

Jiya ................ Yesterday

Da Safe ................. In the morning

Da Rana ............... In the afternoon

Da Yama ............. In the evening

Da Dare ............. In the night

Zo .......... Come

Tafi ......... Go

Zauna ............Sit down

In sha' Allah ............ By God's Grace

Yaro/ Yarinya .............. Boy/ Girl

Mata/ Mutum ................ Woman/ Man

Takalmi ................ Shoes

Riga .............. Dress

Hula ............. Cap          

Eating 

Abinchi ....... Food

Ruwa ........ Water

Shinkafa ........ Rice

Wake .......... Beans

Miya ........ Soup

Doya ......... Yam       

The Body

Kai ......... Head

Gashi ........ Hair

Ido ........ Eye

Hanchi ....... Nose

Baki ........ Mouth

Hanu ......... Hand

Chiki ......... Stomach (also means 'inside' depending on stress on last syllable)

Baya ......... Back

Kafa ......... Leg

Duwawu .......... Bottom

If you want to learn how to speak Hausa click here

Debenhams' Hausa Sign Annoys Nigerians

People were surprised that major department store Debenhams in London decided to appeal to Nigerian customers by using the Hausa language in their signage last month, because they felt that Hausa was the least popular language spoken by Nigerians in the UK.

Debenhams' Oxford Street store puts up signage featuring the Hausa language at the bottom 

The signs featured the words "Na gode don sayayyarka a Debenhams" which means "Thank you for shopping at Debenhams" in Hausa, with the words also in Arabic and Mandarin. Debenhams said it selected the languages based on the highest number of overseas shoppers who claimed their tax back within the store.

One poster commenting on the topic on the Nairaland forum said:

"I think the shop owners may just be misinformed. Igbo or Yoruba would have been better. I have met very few Hausas in the UK. . . very few."

But I think Debenhams and other major stores like Harrods and Selfridges are right to court Hausa customers.

Hausas may be few in number, but the majority of those in the UK are wealthy and influential and spend lots of money in London. On the other hand, Nigerians from other tribes in the UK are largely working class and often shop in the inner-city areas. The ratio of rich Hausas to average Nigerians may be as low as 1:8, but in terms of spending power, major retailers respect them more.

Also, Hausa/Fulani shoppers are concentrated in the Oxford Street/ Edgware Road area because of the large Muslim and Arab community there, so whilst other tribes spread their wealth across the UK, Hausas are repeat, respected and respectable customers in the same large stores around Oxford Street.

A funny cartoon comparing Igbo, Yoruba and Hausa/Fulani shoppers

Because of the common sight of poor Hausa children begging on the streets of Nigeria and the 'Maiguards' (gatekeepers) of many Nigerian homes been poorly-paid Hausa men, many think that rich Northerners are too few to matter to British retailers.

But professional, educated Hausa/Fulanis in the UK (see my post 8 Reasons Why You Meet Few Hausa People in the UK) are harder to spot because they are not usually found in Nigerian-dominated areas in London as many live outside London. Also, many Hausa/Fulani men and women look 'different' because of their Islamic attire. 

People underestimate Hausa/Fulanis. They imagine we're poor, uneducated and uninterested in the finer things in life. This is true to some extent, but rich Alhajis and their families travel abroad to shop just as much as other tribes, having made their money in politics and business like other Nigerians.

Hausa is also the second most widely spoken language in Africa after Swahili, with approximately 43 million speakers across West Africa including Ghana, Sudan, Togo, Burkina Faso, Benin, Cameroon and Niger. So though Yorubas are dominant in the Nigerian diaspora, there are only 20 million speakers worldwide, the majority of whom are Nigerians with some speakers in Togo and Benin.

I applaud Debenhams for featuring Hausa in its signage, not only because of the language's popularity across Africa but also because this helps to show other Nigerians that Hausa/Fulanis have an important presence outside of Nigeria.

5 Annoying Stereotypes People Believe About Africa

I was watching TV recently and a programme called Prince William's Africa came on. Now programmes about westerners going to Africa inevitably focuses on huts, tribal wear and bare-footed urchins, all of which makes me cringe. But following the Prince's beautiful wedding and my increased admiration for him, I thought I would give it a chance. Alas, the stereotypes about my continent that is deeply embedded in the Western psyche were prominent.

Here are 5 popular assumptions about Africa, plus the reality:

1. DRUM BEATS
Any show about Africa always but always opens with 'appropriate African music' which is: fast drumming accompanied by lone, mournful wailing or aggressive chants by deep-voiced men.

Reality: Modern Africans listen to African-flavoured Hip Hop, RnB and Afropop by homegrown artists performing in English/pidgin/local languages. Drums do play a major role and traditional African Highlife-style music is popular, but most of the jungle-drumming, Lion Sleeps Tonight 'African sound' you hear is only venerated by Westerners.

Modern African music: If You Ask Me by Omawumi (Pidgin)

2. HUTS
Prince William's Africa took some British youths to Botswana for the first time, and the voice-over stated that they were to "live as Africans: in a simple hut with no hot water, no electricity and a diet of pap porridge." I almost kicked my TV in anger.

Reality: I've visited Nigeria and I NEVER saw a thatched roof, mud-walled hut. Basic, ramshackle structures yes, but even when I visited my grandparents' village I saw two-storey houses and paved roads. I have been to a house with one of those 'squat over a hole' toilets, but the majority of homes in towns and cities are built with bricks and have (sporadic) electricity and water out of taps thank you very much.

Lagos: Look, no Huts!

Lagos Airport: But Western journalists want the 'real' Africa

I'm not saying huts don't exist, I'm saying 60% of Africans live nowhere near one. The funny thing is that airports are situated in the cities so the first thing Western journalists see when they arrive is the bustling traffic and office buildings common to every city, but they don't start filming until they've driven six hours into the most remote village out in the middle of nowhere and call that Africa. Then they return to their comfortable hotel rooms in the city to prepare their reports.

3. WILD ANIMALS
The prevalence of nature documentaries filmed in Africa means that wild animals are so intertwined with notions of the continent that some think lions, tigers and rhinos are a common sight for Africans.

Reality: I saw lizards, cattle, emaciated dogs and one snake, but no safari animals. I know these are mostly found in South Africa or Kenya, but contrary to popular opinion the majority of Africans don't live side by side with giraffes, and only a small population of poor tribes living away from their country's cities hunt game for food.

4. AFRICA AS A COUNTRY
The former US vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin famously referred to Africa as a country, and when many visit Ghana for example they say they've been to 'Africa,' lumping 54 unrelated countries into one indistinct entity.

Reality: The African continent is made up of 54 countries with over 1 billion people and 2,000 languages with almost as many cultures. Each African country has a particular personality and differentiating one from another helps to promote this fact.

5. LOIN CLOTHS
There's the over-used convention when film crews visit Africa of filming a row of scantily clad women in grass rara-skirts and beaded ankle jewellery, and spear-wielding, loin-clothed men with feather-headpieces singing and hop-dancing to welcome visiting western dignitaries who look on in benevolent appreciation.

Reality: I watched the DVD extras for the well-known movie The Gods Must Be Crazy (1981) which revealed that the loin-clothed African Bushmen running around the Kalahari dessert featured in the film were wearing costumes the director provided, as they usually dressed in trousers and T-shirts. Most of the 'authentic Africans' presented as a spectacle for tourists dress that way to make money. Whilst this display of culture is interesting, it does not reflect the daily attire of rich and poor Africans who wear 'western' clothing or fully-covered ethnic designs similar to those featured on my British Weddings vs Nigerian Weddings post.

Constantly featuring images of Masai warriors and Zulu dancers and saying 'This is Africa' is like focusing on Burberry & gold-jewellery-wearing 'Chavs' or handkerchief-waving Morris Dancers and saying 'This is Britain.' These are distinct sub-groups and traditional 'actors' that do not represent the whole population.

A rarity on western TV: Well-dressed and well-fed African children

7 Reasons Why Nigerian Sites Have Bad Grammar

I visit a lot of Nigerian-produced news and entertainment sites, blogs and forums, and unfortunately a lot of the writing there leaves a lot to be desired. It's disappointing when a fascinating subject is ruined by bad grammar, the hyper-zealous use of a thesaurus or grand, convoluted sentences when simpler phrasing would do.

I wish I could 'red-pen' websites...

As an avid wordsmith who has studied the art of writing, sentences like Yes, i understand; 90's CD's and DVD's or Am in love irks me. (If you see nothing wrong with these sentences, then I envy the ease of your daily reading experience!)

And the habit of writers to use twelve words when three would do is also bothersome, so that a sentence like:

"Little five-year-old Ayo Azeez's mother had left his biological father after irreconcilable misunderstanding which led to their separation. The boy then became gravely ill and was immediately rushed to a nearby hospital but he gave up even before any medication could be administered on him."

Should be edited to:

"Five year old Ayo Azeez's mother had separated from his father before he fell ill. He was then rushed to a nearby hospital but died before receiving treatment."  

It sure does

Here are 7 reasons why I believe many Nigerians employ verbose, unprofessional English:

1. Sub-standard University Education

All Nigerians that can afford it go to university because education is a matter of pride and necessity. But the education many receive is often of low quality due to the lack of government funding and rampant teacher strikes caused by the non-payment of salaries, which turns a three-year degree into a six-year interrupted struggle. Inconsistent electricity also interrupts the use of computers and other technologies vital for a thorough education. Eventually poor students become poor teachers and the cycle is unbroken.

2. Journalism is an Unpopular Degree

Law, accounting and medical degrees are popular choices for Nigerians, but journalism is not. This is due to the little attention paid to literature and the lower pay journalists expect. The country's children are not encouraged to pursue a writing career and the majority of the country's journalists today began their careers in a completely different profession.

In my case, my father was a broadcast journalist and I read all the books on our bookshelf (my mother was once an avid reader though she no longer cares for books). My favourite was Enid Blyton's The Adventures of the Wishing Chair and I wanted to be a children's writer before deciding on journalism. I was neither encouraged nor discouraged to pursue it, and growing up I'd never heard of any Nigerian print journalists.

3. Poor Reading Culture

It is a sad fact that Nigerians don't value reading. Things Fall Apart by Nigerian Chinua Achebe is the most famous book written by an African, yet the ratio of Americans to Nigerians who have read it is probably 3:1. The more one reads, the better their grammar, and Nigerian writer Chimamanda Adichie set up The Farafina Trust to encourage reading and creative writing stating that::

"...If my novel had been first published in Nigeria...I would not have had an editor or publicity or marketing. The newspapers would have taken scant notice... [and] I would expect only family and friends to buy the novel because we are a country of people who do not regard and do not read literature. Many Nigerians say...we are too poor to read. Literature is, after all, a middle-class preserve and... reading has been put aside for the pursuit of basic survival."

Nigerians should encourage their children to read

4. Bribery

Institutional bribery means that the least intelligent but wealthy students often get the best grades above the intelligent but poorer students, so that those that get the writing jobs in the end are unqualified having only bought their grades.

5. Nepotism

To get a good job in Nigeria, who you know gets you further than ability or education. Many under-qualified people become 'Features Editor' or 'Reporter' because their aunt or brother-in-law is the Editor or Publisher. So someone with friends in high places, a degree in Forestry and a disregard for proper sentence structures can have their work published in the country's most popular publications.

6. English as a Second Language

English is the official language but all Nigerians have a different mother-tongue and many are only familiar with pidgin-English. This means that the level of acceptable spoken and written English in many arenas is lower than in western establishments, and the errors prevalent in using imperfect grammar is ignored or not even noted.

7. The 'More is Best' Thinking

Nigerians are often extroverts and this follows into their writing where the 'posher' the words sound, the better the writer is regarded. I remember reading a letter from my grandfather to my mother and being perplexed by the formal tone, along the lines of  "it is with the utmost trepidation that I hasten to..."

This contrasts with Western writing where simplicity and succinctness rule, and industry standards mean that British articles have a particular flow unlike Nigerian articles. Of course there are Nigerians trained in universal journalistic principles from the country's best universities, and quality publications like Thisday are thankfully well written, but Nigerians desecrating the English language abound all over the web.

Some of the websites I visit leave me shaking my head in disbelief or giggling at the unintentional humour of the more ambitious sentences.

I'm a Submissive Woman...What's Wrong With That?

I am not as young or as innocent as I look, yet every time I cross the street with any man, whether I've known him 10 minutes or 10 years, they either hold my arm/hand or put a protective hand on my back and lead me to the other side of the road.

Most Western-minded, proudly independent, 21st Century women would be insulted by this because they feel it patronises them; they can cross the street just as well as any man! I don't. I take it as a compliment that a man acts on his natural instinct to protect when he's with me. Some women, because of the aggressive vibe they give out quench this gentlemanly behaviour in guys, but I'd like to think it is because of my sweet, accommodating nature that men are willing to open doors or pull out chairs for me.

Now I know and they know that I can do these things for myself, but that's not the point. I'm a lover of classic literature like Pride and Prejudice because it describes a time when men were men and ladies behaved decently and were treated with care because they were the fairer sex. I am not insulted by this, and I believe that women that are have either been hurt by misogynistic men or were told that a woman is just as good as a man and doesn't need to be treated differently.

Chivalry: Why Not? 

Well, its their loss. If a man wants to treat me nicely because I am a woman, let him. I know I am just as intelligent as he is, so why should his chivalry make me feel bad?

There's a difference between a man opening a door for you and a man not allowing you to speak in public. Women in certain Middle-Eastern or African countries have the right to demand more fairness because they are been oppressed, but I'm afraid if women get more fairness in the West they might stop having babies, because if men don't have to do it, why should we?!

So its obvious that I am not a feminist. I thank the Women's Movement for the vote, shattered glass-ceilings and the Pill, but it all spun out of control when:

Women Started Acting Like Men

Some women think that if a man can sleep with 300 women and be admired by his peers, why can't she sleep with 300 men and be equally respected? Well, umm...apart from this being a cry for help, nature discourages it. A man produces trillions of new sperm daily throughout his lifetime, whilst a woman is born with about 400 viable eggs, is able to fertilise only one a month, and then they run out when she's 45. Also, women tend to get pregnant after sex whilst men can walk away if they so wish, and the reproduction game is such that whilst a man shoots and deposits, a woman receives and incubates.

All this means that nature has given men the ease and biological efficiency to have sex-and-go a lot, whilst women have to deal with the palaver of periods, pregnancy and ticking biological clocks. It kinda seems as if 'Mother Nature' is a misogynistic man trying to ruin women's fun doesn't it?

Fact is women are BUILT differently from men and it is not everything they do that we should do. Those that want to out-earn, out-drink or out-burp men may feel emancipated now, but a wise man is not looking for a woman to compete with but a mate to build a life with, and a woman that uses her femininity to compliment a man will have a happier home.  

 Women Started Demeaning Men

I dislike watching British adverts these days because of the trend for women to belittle men.  Commercials like Windows 7's Family Photo is one that I actually switch channels to avoid watching. I just get angsty about seeing a woman say things to a man that will cause outrage if the tables were turned. Watch a round of adverts next time you're in front of the TV with this in mind, and you'll see stroppy, domineering women chastising gormless men for being inept. Its never the other way round. Because that would be sexist.

 The ad that makes me mad

The funny thing is that ad executives are overwhelmingly male, so either they're being funny, or worried that if they don't toe the feminist line there would be backlash. It's probably the latter.

I was watching a show about weddings, where it is the norm for the bride-to-be to complain that the groom doesn't help enough etc and then a 'Fairy God-mother' is called to help. But one episode had a wealthy young man who was outspoken about the fact that he'll pay for the wedding, but the bride should make all the arrangements (he was American. I noticed that their adverts are fairer). The female voice-over and 'Fairy God-mother' were indignant: how dare he be so honest about his disinterest and put the bride in a bad light! Didn't he read the memo? Only the bride can complain; the man should just nod and apologise!

The gender role-reversal in the media probably reflects reality. Today most divorces are initiated by the woman who is encouraged to not put up with any dissent... I mean failings in a man. Of course I know that men can be *%*#*@*, but perhaps women don't try so hard anymore?

Women Started Saying They Didn't Need Men

I used to say this. Back when I was young and drunk on the feminist power Destiny's Child sung about. Sure women can and have raised babies who became well-adjusted adults without the help of men, but should they? It's fine if you have no choice, but to make a conscious decision that you want to raise your child without a father is like cutting your nose to spite your face. Children from such homes grow up with daddy issues because it was never supposed to be that way.

Women also say this to mean they can buy their own houses, cars, clothes, weaves, shoes etc without the help of men. That's fabulous. I'm sure the men are quite happy not to have to pay for all these things too. But I personally want my husband to take care of me and be the breadwinner, a man who feels that it is his responsibility to provide for his family.

And in marriage I'll take primary care of the children, (since they grew in my body for nine months and were then fed with my body-juice, it seems fair) cook, clean, work and help my husband be the best he can be, whilst he protects, provides and loves and respects me as the superwoman-mother-wife-lady I am. It'll be great if he'll help with the dishes sometimes, but he doesn't have to.

I want to exemplify the lyrics to that long-forgotten song:

"I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never, ever let you forget you're a man, cause I'm a woman."

It's old-fashioned and I love it. There's something....wholesome about the natural order of things.

10 Reasons Why Hausa Nigerians Riot

Northern Nigeria has a long history of religious and ethnic violence, with Hausa/Muslim men the main perpetrators.

In 2002 the Miss World Contest was relocated from Abuja, Nigeria to London because of violent deaths as Hausa-Muslims protested against the competition; in 2005 200 people were killed in Northern states after a Dutch newspaper published cartoons depicting the Prophet Muhammad; In 2007 a Christian teacher was burnt alive by Muslim students after rumours spread that she had dropped the Qur'an, and in 2011 houses were burnt and people killed by angry Hausa/Muslim protesters following the election victory of Southern President Goodluck Jonathan instead of the Northern presidential candidate Muhammadu Buhari.

Rioting Youths in Kano

So are Hausas too aggressive? Does Islam promote violence? Here are 10 reasons why I think there is so much unrest in the North.

1. Easygoing But Serious-Minded

As stated in my previous post 8 Reasons Why You Meet Few Hausas in the UK, Hausas are primarily laid-back people who are more reserved than the exuberant Southerners. But though they have calm personalities, they are very serious-minded about honour and religion. They are easy to get along with but the one thing they never joke about Islam.

2. Strict Nature of Islam

The fact that most Hausas are Muslims also explains their serious personalities and inability to compromise. Islam, as opposed to Christianity, is very strict about its customs which have to be fully obeyed without excuse. Whereas not every Christian fasts for Lent or covers their head when they pray, and Christianity tolerates criticism and casual observance from its followers, Muslim leaders demand total obedience and questioning authority is highly discouraged.

So as Islam has been a major influence in Hausa communities for centuries, it has shaped the Hausa man's strictness and intolerance of dissent. This intolerance is also evident in other Islamic countries like Saudi Arabia and Pakistan where other religions are surpressed.

3. Religious Leaders

The Imams in the Hausa community have a lot of power in influencing the way the people think. But certain Imams, armed with the knowledge that their people are highly intolerant of Islamic disrespect, often provoke Hausa youths to violence to further their own political or economic interests. Most Hausas never even saw the Dutch cartoons, but at the instigation of their Imams they committed murder when told that so-and-so insulted the Prophet.

The Qur'an

4. Lack of Family

The culture of poor Hausa parents sending their young sons off to Islamic boarding schools miles from their homes is a major factor to the prevalence of millions of unsupervised youths (Almajiris) terrorising the streets of Northern Nigeria. These youths grow up with no parental care and are desolate, desperate and unskilled. The lack of moral guidance coupled with the neglect and abuse from their Imams (the kids have to beg for food and money) leaves the almajiris suseptible to criminal activities including murder and vandalism.

5. Islamic Education

Hausa-Muslims despise state education (which they deem western and Christian) and insist on only an Islamic education for their youth, which isolates them from other Nigerians (and the world) in terms of understanding science, maths, writing and other information vital to knowing how the world works. The singular curriculum of a Qur'anic education not only blinds almajiris to universal truths but also disables their ability to deal efficiently in the professional and business arena, and so they remain poor and dependant on Imams who use their ignorance and idleness for violence.

6. Lack of Jobs

A Hausa man with a full time job does not have the time to riot. But many Hausa youths are just as jobless as their Southern counterparts and they can be paid or easily pushed to violence in relation to their religion because Islam is all they know and all they have.

7. Pack Mentality

The Hausa/Fulanis are less likely to inter-marry or mingle with other ethnicities in Nigeria, which means that they remain closely-knit and fiercely defensive of their culture; when you attack one you attack all. The mixture of views and backgrounds in the South makes it harder for people there to come together under one ideology, but the unambiguity of Islam and cultural cohesiveness of the Hausas makes it easier for them to unite to defend their religion.

8. Religion vs Money

Hausas are more religion-conscious than money-conscious. They would rather be thought of as good Muslims than rich men. That is why religious disrespect (also linked to cultural honour) is the only thing that will bring a Hausa man to shout in the streets, whereas in areas like the Niger Delta it is the desire for more oil wealth that gets the youths rioting.

9. Ethnic divisions

The difference between Hausa/Fulanis and other Nigerians is more pronounced because of the influence of Islam. Whereas Yorubas, Igbos and other ethnicities in Nigeria share Christianity, language origins and cultural similarities, the Hausa/Fulanis are distinct, which means issues are easily turned into an 'us' vs 'them' situation.

10. Christianity vs Islam

The New Testament emphasises love for your neighbour, and the statement by Jesus that if someone wrongs you 'turn the other cheek' is well known amongst Christians and non-Christians so that violence is discouraged. But Islam is more tolerant about fighting for your religion ("Fighting is obligatory for you, much as you dislike it" Surah 2:216), and the concept of jihad, infidels and matyrdom leading to paradise is encouraged by Imams.

Islam is also male-dominated and women are separated so that their gentler influence on the religion is absent, as opposed to Christianity where it is often the mother that exemplifies the religion and women fill the church.

?SOLUTION?

Ex-British Prime Minister Tony Blair once said the UK's main objective should be:

"Education, Education, Education"

It is also true for Northern Nigeria. I know Hausa men whose natural inclination towards intolerance has been quelled by mainstream education or Christianity. Education elevated the primitive, barbaric and superstitious European into reasoned men who instituted laws based on fairness and justice and not an ancient book, and it can do the same for Northerners.

Someone once said:

"With or without religion, good people can behave well and bad people can do evil; but for good people to do evil — that takes religion"

This is true of Hausa Muslims. But with a decent state education their religion will stop being a hindrance to their humanity.

Why I Love The Hausa Language

I'm in love with the Hausa language, my mother tongue. I love the beauty of its words and its history and etymology.

When I was younger we spoke it at home as usual, then when my siblings and I started school we started speaking to our parents primarily in English, until soon my mother started speaking to us in English also. So as there was no one around speaking it regularly, I started to forget. 

This was fine at first because in London speaking Hausa was not a requirement. I thought I was still fluent till I dated a Hausa guy and we tried having a conversation and to my horror I found myself having to pause and think before coming up with the right words, or asking him to slow down so I could understand better, and finding out that due to the termination of my Hausa speaking in childhood, most of my vocabulary was domesticated and confined to family/home discourses so that a conversation on the presidential election was beyond my capabilities. 

I was, however, pleased to note that I could still pronounce certain words correctly, like daya (one) or kara (add) where the 'd' and 'k' is a sharp, implosive sound, or tsaya (stand/stay) where the 's' is pronounced with quick 't' before it. These are all tricks of the tongue that can't be easily taught. There's also the subtle differences with words spelt the same way, like gashi which means hair when the last syllable is low, and 'take this' when it is high.

So a phrase with a double sharp 'd' like 'ga gyada mai dadi,' which I remember young girls chanting in Kaduna as they walked by with a tray full of tins of groundnuts on their heads for sale, would be a challenge for non-native speakers.

Hausa is the most widely spoken language from the Chadic languages group, which in turn is part of the Afro-Asiatic language family where Arabic comes from. This makes it distinct from many other African languages, and rather than the drum-beat influenced sounds of Nigerian languages like Yoruba, Hausa has sharper sounds and spiked parts, and extensive use of 'a' and 'i' vowels as opposed to 'o' and 'u'.

(See more explanations of the Hausa language on Wikipedia here)

The historical connection between Hausa/Fulanis and Arab/Asians extends beyond their common Islamic history. Arabic phrases have become part of the Hausa language, e.g. In sha' Allah which means God willing; and Indian film and music styles are emulated amongst Hausa/Fulanis, as is Henna hand decorations for women which originated in India and Islamic clothing styles and head coverings. The ancestory of the nomadic Fulanis, who have an Arabian appearance and are present in other parts of West Africa as well as Nigeria, have also been traced to Mauritania in North Africa. 

People from Mauritania in North Africa

I remember, whilst waiting at a bus stop a while back, hearing the man standing next to me speaking Hausa on the phone. I was amazed! I'd never heard Hausa spoken by a non-family member outside of Nigeria before so I strained to hear him some more and after he ended his call I couldn't resist introducing myself. It was like no matter who he was, we had the Hausa language in common which made him familiar and safe.

I've since made new Hausa friends and they think nothing of speaking to their family and friends in Hausa, but to me, the crisp words are music to my ears and a joyful re-introduction to my history, and as they speaks it's as if my past is unravelled as I remember phrases and words I'd long forgotten. 

Speaking Hausa again is like re-discovering something valuable that you lost without knowing when, so that when you find it again you are pleasantly surprised and hold on tighter to it this time around.

Gari and Water vs Gari and Milk

I love gari, milk and sugar. I have it for breakfast sometimes, like an exotic cereal, or as a snack. Its also great as a big lunch because the gari grains have a way of expanding in your stomach that leaves you fuller for longer.

Gari

But I've been told that drinking gari with milk is odd and that it is normally drunk with water. I think "Ewww," it would taste too bland and unappetising without the fuller, creamier flavour milk gives it, especially when the gari granules are the soft, fine ones and not the tougher, coarser, larger grains.

I know most people drink it with water and even add ground nuts, kuli kuli or beans to it. Not me. Just give me gari, milk and sugar and I'm happy. 

Everybody else just does not know what they're missing.