Finding out that the author of The Break Up Recipe, Munir Bello is a British Fulani-Nigerian piqued my curiosity immensely.
Munir Bello, Author of The Break Up Recipe
Sure, his self-published e-book about relationships is hilarious and received rave reviews from publications like The Voice and Female First, and reviews here and here were also glowing, but what I really wanted to know was: what did his parents think about him stripping naked to promote the book (yes, that's his well-oiled physique below)?
And was his ex-fiancée - the woman that inspired him to write after she broke up with him - Black, Nigerian, Fulani or none of the above?
Munir strips totally naked to promote The Break Up Recipe. As you do.
Munir also said that he attended a Gay Pride parade to hand out flyers promoting his book, and is happy to attract a gay audience thanks to his hot bod on display. This 30-year old Fulani man's outlook on life is definitely refreshing, so I asked him a whole load of questions, and bless him, he not only answered all 50 (I was very curious) with great candour and humour, he also gave me an insight into how another Fulani Brit thinks. Thanks Munir!
BIOGRAPHY
Where were you born?
I was born in Lagos, Nigeria in 1983
Where were you raised?
I was raised in Lagos where I went to school until the age of 10 and travelled around Kaduna, Sokoto, Kano and Abuja where I have family. I then moved to England at the age of 10 to school and have permanently lived here since. I used to go back to Nigeria quite regularly during the school holidays, but less frequently now as my immediate family now live in London.
Describe your family.
Like most I am the product of a mother and father. They live in London. My father is a consultant and my mother runs a small business. I have 3 siblings; the oldest is a lawyer, my younger sister works in sales and my younger brother is a radio presenter.
What is your current occupation?
I am an author. I wrote a book called The Break Up recipe. I am also currently in the process of writing the sequel for the book as well as filming a dating show in London which will be airing in the summer.
What is your family's religion and what is your personal religious belief?
I was born into a Muslim family and I am a part-time Muslim. By that I mean that I do consider myself a Muslim, however I am not fully practising. I fast during Ramadan.
What career did you want to go into when you were younger?
I originally wanted to either be an actor or a journalist. I realised early on that I was not good enough to be an actor so decided to concentrate on something else. As for journalism, it was something that as I got older, I had less of a desire to do.
BEING NIGERIAN
What is your relationship with Sokoto/Zamfara?
My paternal grandmother lives in a small village in the state and so do some of my uncles, aunties and cousins. I very much do consider it my home and generally when I am asked where I am from I tell people that I am a Nigerian from Sokoto (It has been pointed out to me that it is now Zamfara, but when I was growing up it was Sokoto and that has now stuck in my vocabulary)
What is your relationship with Nigeria?
Nigeria is the country that I am from. Although I am a dual passport holder and have lived most of my life in The UK, I consider myself a Nigerian as my earliest memories are from there. I speak Hausa at home to my family which serves as a reminder to my roots.
Do you have any extended family in Nigeria, and if so, are you still close to them?
I have plenty of extended family in Nigeria as I come from a very large family, and I am close to them. We communicate regularly online.
What is your view on Boko Haram?
My view on Boko Haram is that it is an organisation that has put our country in the news for all the wrong reasons. I am certainly not in any way a sympathiser.
What is your view on the Bring Back Our Girls campaign and it's popularity around the world?
I am glad that the world is sitting up and taking notice by trying to help us eradicate the problem with the violent attacks. I am sad, however, that the name of my country is seen as synonymous with terrorism which unfortunately is one of the first words that come out of people's mouths now [when they thing about Nigeria]. The campaign hopefully sends out a strong message of support to the families of these girls and I hope that in the end it helps bring them home. I also hope that it isn't just a social media fad that will lead to a swift evacuation if it becomes considered as old news.
What is your view of the Nigerian government?
My view on Nigerian politics is extremely limited as I don't keep up to date with the current affairs. From what I know, we have a president who seems powerless in the face of everything and we have a first lady who delivers many excellent sound-bites that bring a huge smile to my face. In fact, my neighbour and I have been watching lots of her Youtube clips recently. Interesting is a word that springs to mind.
Would you ever return to Nigeria to live long-term?
'I don't know' is the honest answer to that question. The reason is because two thirds of my life have been lived in the UK so I am more used to the way things work over here. I wouldn't rule out living in Nigeria for long periods of time over the course of a year in the future, as when I have children I would like them to know where their father comes from.
Would you want your kids to be strongly connected to Nigeria?
I absolutely would because I have so many wonderful memories from when I was living there. As mentioned previously, I'd like them to know where their father comes from as there is a strong likelihood that they would be raised in the UK.
Are you proud to be Nigerian, given often negative perceptions of the country?
I'm very proud to be a Nigerian because there are values within our people that are very commendable, such as a strong work ethic and an entrepreneurial streak that is unrivalled. We also are very good at adapting and some of the hardest working people I have ever known are from Nigeria. The negative perceptions which are well publicised are to do with fraud, corruption and most recently, bomb attacks. The positives greatly outweigh the negatives. We have the biggest GDP in Africa and some amazing scholars.
Munir Bello: Proudly Nigerian, proudly British and proudly Fulani
What do your non-Nigerian friends thing about the country?
Generally speaking a lot of them would like to visit the country mostly due to the great PR the food receives over here. I do tend to introduce them to some of our foods. The weather also means that it is a natural draw for non-Nigerian friends of mine who spend a lot of their time in cold climates. The lifestyle and pace of life over there also makes it appealing to friends of mine who have visited the country.
BEING FULANI
What does being Fulani mean to you?
I live with the knowledge that being Fulani, I am part of what was the old ruling class and am sometimes unfairly judged as the son of a rich man who knows nothing about a hard life or hard work which couldn't be further from the truth. At the same time however, it is a fact that we are the best looking people in Nigeria and yes I am being biased on my beautiful family members. Our people are traditionally nomads, hence why it was a seamless transition for me to move to another country.
Do you think being Fulani differentiates you from other Nigerians? If so why?
The differentiation has been touched on in the previous question. It is more apparent in the UK than back home because there aren't many of us here. The majority of Nigerians present here tend to be Igbo or Yoruba.
Would you say you were knowledgeable about Fulani customs and traditions?
I'm ashamed to say that I am not knowledgeable enough to have a debate about Fulani customs. I know small bits from my time over in Nigerian and from what my parents have tried to teach. Fura da nono is one tradition I am fully fluent in.
Are you proud of your Fulani heritage?
Without a shadow of a doubt, yes I am.
What aspects of Fulani culture do you most identify with?
Being a nomad.
What are your thoughts on Fulani nomads and their lifestyle?
Very admirable. I have a lot of respect for the discipline it takes to be a cattle herder, which is underrated.
What are your thoughts on the spate of Fulani gunmen that allegedly shoot down many villages in the North?
It is not a subject that I am familiar with but my thoughts on any gunman that would shoot down a village of people is that he is a coward.
How do your family honour your Fulani heritage, if at all?
They've instilled in me not to forget where I come from and always make a point of reminding me that I come from a people I should be proud of which I am.
Do you speak Fulfude?
Sadly not.
Do you know/have met Fulanis from across Africa, and how did you get on?
I met a Fulani from Sierra Leone 16 years ago and we are friends to this day.
What do you think about me: a British Fulani Christian?
I think you're normal, there are lots of people who come from a predominantly Muslim community who are Christians. I come from a heavily inter-married family so although my parents are Muslim, my uncles and aunties are a mixture of different religions. Also my grandmother on my mothers side taught me the Bible and the Quran from a very early age.
BEING BRITISH
What do your British friends think about your Fulani heritage?
They don't know anything about the Fulani.
Have you met many Fulani people in England? If not why do you think you haven't?
I have only met one from Sierra Leone. I think the reason for the scarcity of a Fulani presence here is because Fulanis either stay in Nigeria or go to America and other parts of Europe.
Does being a Fulani man affect or influence any aspect of your life in England?
None whatsoever.
In some of the interviews for your book, you mention going out to drink with friends and writing when drunk, and you also pose naked with a cover of your book. How do you reconcile your 'Western' behaviour with a (presumably) conservative Fulani heritage?
I'm a product of a Nigerian upbringing in the first third of my life and a western upbringing the rest of it, meaning that the two cultures meet somewhere in the middle and compromise. The picture for the marketing cover was originally met with some resistance by my parents but not outright opposition, the rest of my family have never commented negatively on it.
What's more important to you: being British, being Nigerian or being a Fulani man?
In order would be 1) Nigerian, as it is where I was born, 2) Fulani as it is my heritage and where I'm from (it's not 1 because of my minuscule knowledge) 3) Being British because it is a nationality I inherited but one that I am nevertheless very proud of.
Does your heritage affect your dating choices or choice of who you will marry?
No not at all; my girlfriend is British and it's not a problem for my family.
What do your family think of your lifestyle?
Good question. I've never really asked them. I think overall they're happy with it as I've never been taken aside by them and told I need to change my ways.
Whenever you return to family in Nigeria, do you feel assimilated or different from them?
I feel assimilated, the only difference would be my accent but i still remember the customs and the correct way to eat the food.
Are you happy you're in England or do you wish you had stayed in Nigeria?
I'm very happy I'm in England. Had I stayed in Nigeria then I wouldn't have gotten to see as much of the world (cheaper to travel form here) as I have or met the many wonderful people that I have met. All the good people I met back home are either now here or if they are back home we are still in touch. Three letters were worth the move over here: KFC!!
What do you think are commonly-held misconceptions people abroad have about Fulani people?That we are a bunch of uneducated in-breds. Not many people realise what the generation before us did which was that they left the country to get first class education and helped pioneer many things back home.
Would you say you play up or play down your Fulaniness?
Neither really, it's something I'm proud of but as I don't get asked much about it, I rarely get the opportunity to elaborate on it.
Has your name, because it is Muslim, ever posed any issues for you?
Oh yes!! Most airports I go to will pull me aside for extra questioning due to "computer generated" reasons. It's the last thing that I need after a long flight but I tend to ignore their stupidity rather than get angry about it.
How do you feel about your Islamic background in a country where Islam is often associated with global terrorism?
I don't hide my Islamic background and so far I've never had any problems because of it. I think I have been very lucky in that respect. I get more irritated by other Muslims from other countries who, once they find out my Islamic background, try to test how much I know, almost as if I need their approval. I find it very pathetic. Muslim converts also tend to do this a lot.
Do you feel completely assimilated into English life or do you feel like an outsider sometimes?
I am an outsider because outside of a major city I am considered a minority. I don't feel alienated, but I am aware that I am not considered as the norm in some quarters, but then that is very normal because if a white person rocked up into Lagos they would be seen as an outsider also. It's never hostile on either side however.
HIS BOOK
Describe what The Break Up Recipe is about.
The Break Up Recipe is a romantic comedy from the point of view of a man. it contains some funny observations on life and some expletive language. To sum it up, a guy gets dumped by his fiancee and then looks back on his previous encounters with the opposite sex. He comes back to the modern day and creates new experiences with the opposite sex.
What do your family think about your book?
They like it. They have been incredibly supportive throughout. They did initially harbour reservations over the language and the naked image, but were never hostile about it.
You state that you were inspired to write it after a bad break-up with a fiancée; where was she from/what race was she?
Bloody hell you really have done your research! I was wondering when that question was going to come up haha. She was a white British girl.
Did her race pose any problems for you?
Absolutely none. As pointed out earlier, due to the regular intermarriage within my own family, dating outside my race/religion has never been an issue. Come to think of it, it's very acceptable as it's never even been mentioned or alluded to when I've told my parents about someone I'm dating.
Does your Fulani heritage show up anywhere in The Break Up Recipe?
No there isn't any mention of my Fulani heritage in the book.
Do you think the book would have succeeded had it being published in Nigeria?
Time will tell, there is definitely a huge audience in Nigeria that would appreciate it. however due to limited accessibility (It was originally released as an e-Book) it's too soon to say. Now that it has been released as a paperback, we will see. In fact today was the official release day of the book as a hard copy.
What do you think of other Nigerian novelists like Chimamanda Adichie et al?
She is a wonderful author and a great ambassador for our country. I love her books and think that she paints a wonderful picture of our country through words.
Much of the reviews I read didn't focus on your race/nationality, why do you think that is?
The reason for that would be because they were reviewing the book rather than the author, but in some interviews it is something that is referred to. The book isn't set in Nigeria and it has no race references, hence why no reviews would mention it. My bio however states my nationality and my pictures kind of give away my race, especially my marketing picture.
What would you do if the follow up to The Break Up Recipe gets on the New York Times best-seller list?
What I always do when something good happens to me: I'd say a silent thank you to God first, after that I'd probably go on a holiday and enjoy a well deserved rest.
See? Nice guy, great answers, hot bod. So go get the book on
Amazon! And also connect with him on
Facebook and
Twitter.